excerpt from the Foreword of the book " Seeds of Conscious Light"

" There is a life before and after being part of The Awakened Life Project (ALP), just as there is writing before and after. Before coming to the Ashram of ALP, creative writing had always been a silent but steady part of my life. As though I have always felt an intuitive genuine calling to it, it was an important part of my so-called 'identity'. Therefore it always seemed I was in a battle between, on the one hand, trying to be good and maybe make it into a profession and, on the other hand, being very scared of failing. Because of this fear I mostly kept my books closed from other eyes to read.

Coming to the ALP Ashram for a 10-day silent retreat and staying as a volunteer over the winter of 2015, made me see and drop a lot of ideas I had about myself, especially the special one that wanted to be an admired writer. I read in my journals from before and all I could read is the story of a separate 'me', figuring out and dramatizing her life. It felt so old. I tried a new kind of writing, but it was all still very much about 'trying'. No words made sense. I stopped completely trying to write anything interesting. It felt really good not to try to prove anything to anyone. Another thing that happened that felt related was that I could not read any conventional novels anymore. I was always a very eager reader, but now with every book I ope- ned, I could just read conventional stories of separate individuals suffering through life and perpetuating drama.

One year later, we had an amazing online call with our Sangha where we explored the question: If I stopped re- sisting my deepest heart's longing, what would I have to say? I remember waking up in the middle of the night, and words were just entering my consciousness, I grabbed my phone quickly to type it down. The next morning I read what had come to me, and I was astonished by the depth and uniqueness of what seemed to be a poem. I had never written anything like this and I also had ne- ver written a poem. I always had the idea of poetry as something for very special intellectual people. The most amazing thing about reading it, is that it seemed that the words had come from the deepest of my being. And in an instant I knew that there is no separate special 'I' writing anything like this. It is when 'I', with all my ideas about the writer I should be, stepped out of the way and let the truth reveal itself through the body/mind called Lotte."

Lotte Rozemarijn

Cosmic Dancers and Dreamers
Dancing and dreaming
In the midst of the highs and the lows
And the nights of dreadful darkness
And the days of honeyed light.
Crossing the twilight of illusion
Sun-eyed children of a marvelous dawn
Creators of What Is Great
With wide brows of Calm
Breaking the barriers of the world.


Peter Bampton
Illustration by Sasha Epeshina

Before there was no form
Only all, everything
Not this, Not that, No name
Pure Conscious Light

After you were born as form
Some-thing, this or that, a name
Born and forgot
Who You really Are

A seed of Conscious Light

In seeds lies all the wisdom
Waiting
Waiting for the right moment to sprout
Waiting to show
The beauty
The happiness
The light
A seed of Conscious Light

The seed might feel buried
Covered by dirt
Comfortable in this place
Uncomfortable small and alone
Just a seed

Be humble
You're just a seed
But a seed of Conscious Light
And be ready to start sprouting
When your layers of dirt come off
When you start to reveal yourself to the light

Coming out the ground for the first time
You felt naked
You felt vulnerable
But you felt Free

The light that you are saw the light of everything for the first time
And discovered it has always been light
The seed of Conscious Light

You already have all wisdom
All courage
All freedom
There is nothing to wait for
Only light here and now

At the same time you are taking the time
For the right moment
Cleaning from dirt along the way
To sprout slowly - for the pure sake of sprouting
To shoot higher and higher - for the pure sake of shooting
To bloom and flower to show all the colors and shapes that You are - for the pure sake of blooming and flowering

But knowing that you're still
And always will be
Pure Conscious Light

And when you grow and bloom and flower
Don't forget to spread your seeds
Far and generous and abundant
Because that is the only way

You once became a seed yourself.


Lotte Rozemarijn
Illustration by Inês Maria Fernandes

Open heart, strong spine,
Silence, gong, breeze, fly
Are you an agent of the Divine?
Who are you? Who am I?

One, two, three, thirteen, twenty-nine
Breaths, hours, tears, flies
This madness is the way of life –
the more I push, the more you thrive.

You win, your mission is complete
Your anxious, wet and sticky feet Inside my eyes, between my lips
I don't resist, perception flips.

I rest as still and peaceful space
No time, no smell, no shape, no place
What's this sweet tickle on my face?
I am your home, forever blessed –
The more you dance, the more I rest.

Fly, fear, thought, desire, wind, water, snow, dust
We are one Life
We are one Fire
Let's play
I love you
We are vast.


Sasha Epeshina
Illustration by Sasha Epeshina

The intimacy springs naturally from the heart itself
This intimacy is expressed through us
We are the intimacy connected in one organism that is ever-present.

The recognition comes with an extreme edging quality
A sense of continuous creative and free tension.
The soul is boiling and purifying.
The heart is on fire, with various attempts from the mind to grasp it.
What is going on here?

The mind tries and tries but only finds ground in the surrender
Surrendering to what is here, to the One Heart that is animating all of us
And when the attention becomes Free, then the Heart Shines.

Your smiles, your faces, your bodies, your shapes
All different and unique
All the jokes, all the surrenders, all the genuine interest and pure curiosity
Shines through you with so much power.

To be it, is to go beyond any idea of brotherhood
Brothers in the Heart
Living on the edge, not holding back.

I don't know what's going on here and I don't need to know

In the next and every second, the answer IS
It just IS, refreshing and new
Purifying any temptation of putting it into a box.
There is no brotherhood.
There is just Love
Pure Presence with each other.


Rui Santos

Discovering new paths and new words
A new language
A new way of living
But if everyday is new, isn't that always the case?


By Raquel Perdigão Williams
Illustration by Inês Fonseca

Be still
Can you hear me? I am the breath The birds
The Wind

Be still
Can you feel me?
I am the warmth
The beating of your heart The sensation of your skin

Be still
Can you see me?
I am the light in your eyes
The darkness in the night
The mystery of your consciousness

I am still
I can hear you I can feel you I can see you

I am still
I hear the depth of you in my voice
I feel the life of you in my body
I see the potential through your eyes

I am here
I embrace you
I accept you
I have found you I am you


Cynthia Lea Rose
Illustration by Inês Maria Fernandes

Que não se vê, mas que, de alguma forma, cintila
Forte, não subtil, que se faz notar, ouvir, sentir
É mesmo uma lua de sementeiras: concretizações e desejos Mas que não vêm de um ser separado
Que nos mostram que estamos mesmo ao serviço, e que, se isso evitarmos, sofremos
Deixa-te ser apenas.
Olha-te e sente-te e ouve-te. Saboreia-te
E 'te' é Deus sabes?
Deusa, Luz, Universo, Amor
Numa entrega plena, em satisfação e num largar de tudo o que te limita
Em cada semente colocada em terra fértil, testemunharás o infinito
Na própria sementeira, na terra, na água, no crescimento... em tudo, Deus é
Tu és
Olha-te e vê-te
Vê o infinito de cores e variedade
O infinito de felicidade e criação
A Lua nova pode não se ver, mas ela permite-te ver o visível e o invisível
O concreto e o inimaginável
A separação como ilusão
A unidade como verdade
O não dual, o Um
A aceitação do Infinito em si

(English translation)

That which isn't seen, but that somehow sparkles Strong, not subtle, making itself noticed, heard, felt
It is a moon that sows: materializations and desires That don't come from a separate being
Instead they show us that we are surely in service,
And when we avoid this, we suffer.
Just let yourself be
Look, feel and listen to yourself
Taste yourself
And 'you' are God, you know?
Goddess, Light, Universe, Love
In full surrender, in satisfaction and in letting go of everything that limits you
In each seed placed in fertile ground, you will witness the Infinite
In the sowing itself, in the land, in the water, in the growth... in everything
God Is
You are
Look and see yourself
See the infinity of colours and variety
The infinity of happiness and creation
The New Moon can not be seen, but it allows you to see the visible and the invisible
The concrete and the unimaginable
Separation as an illusion
And Unity as the Truth
The non-dual, the One
The acceptance of the Infinite in you

Raquel Perdigão Williams
Illustration by Sara Esteves Silva